I am tired. I think I am too uptight. I know I should take it easy. Recently, I dreamt of something I cannot really remember. All I could remember was the intense feeling of helplessness. It was so real I could feel bits and pieces of it throughout the day. It is eating me away. I need to relax. I need to let it go.
And so I shall.
Monday, August 16, 2010
Monday, August 9, 2010
Update
Alright guys. This post has to be done under 20 minutes. Just a quick update. For now, the study material of this semester seems difficult. Especially biochem. Lets hope it will get better as the semester progress.
Have you ever felt that there's someone behind you but when you turn around there's no one there? Or when you keep hearing someone calling your name in the crowd but when you turned, again there isn't anyone? I keep having this feeling recently. It's like a weird feeling that won't go away.
Elisa came to visit over the weekends but I couldn't meet up with her much. Sorry 'bout that girl. See you in Singapore k!
Speaking of which, its Singapore's Birthday today! Ah.. how I missed the National Day Celebration. And the goodies bag from the parade. To commemorate this day in my own special way, I have decided to wear my Sg tee and instead of the other pop songs, I would sing the national anthem with pride in the bathroom when I bathe today.
Have you ever felt that there's someone behind you but when you turn around there's no one there? Or when you keep hearing someone calling your name in the crowd but when you turned, again there isn't anyone? I keep having this feeling recently. It's like a weird feeling that won't go away.
Elisa came to visit over the weekends but I couldn't meet up with her much. Sorry 'bout that girl. See you in Singapore k!
Speaking of which, its Singapore's Birthday today! Ah.. how I missed the National Day Celebration. And the goodies bag from the parade. To commemorate this day in my own special way, I have decided to wear my Sg tee and instead of the other pop songs, I would sing the national anthem with pride in the bathroom when I bathe today.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Changing buses
Hello! So I am into my second week of my final semester as an undergrad and everything is kinna different. I was assigned to complete my genetics placement in an institute located at the Waite campus which is about 30-40 minutes away from the North Terrace campus. And because I have the privilege of travelling that far away from the city, I have discovered yet another interesting thing about adelaide.
Did you know that the buses here change their numbers as they travel from the suburbs to the city and vice versa? If you see a bus approaching from afar and the number on the bus is, for example 123, and so you thought it isn't your bus cos you're waiting for number 456 but within a blink of an eye, the bus number changed to 456 and you missed the bus because you didn't know that buses could actually change their numbers as they go. How weird is that? The numbers on the buses in adelaide are electronic, unlike the number printed on board kinds you see in singapore, and so changing the bus number is as easy as pushing a button.
Once I got off a bus (thinking I had to change buses) only to see that the bus I was on had its number changed! And the funny thing is that it was changed to the one I was supposed to go on. So, with embrassment written all over my face, I boarded the same bus... again.
I guess this is one of the few things I have to get used to.
Did you know that the buses here change their numbers as they travel from the suburbs to the city and vice versa? If you see a bus approaching from afar and the number on the bus is, for example 123, and so you thought it isn't your bus cos you're waiting for number 456 but within a blink of an eye, the bus number changed to 456 and you missed the bus because you didn't know that buses could actually change their numbers as they go. How weird is that? The numbers on the buses in adelaide are electronic, unlike the number printed on board kinds you see in singapore, and so changing the bus number is as easy as pushing a button.
Once I got off a bus (thinking I had to change buses) only to see that the bus I was on had its number changed! And the funny thing is that it was changed to the one I was supposed to go on. So, with embrassment written all over my face, I boarded the same bus... again.
I guess this is one of the few things I have to get used to.
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Life or death
I'll tell you a story. A true story. Not of my own but of someone by the name of Ramon Sampedro. He wanted to die.
He was involved in an accident when he was 25 that paralysed him from his neck down. He viewed his existence a burden to his care-taker and wanted to end his life with dignity. It is an irony that the very reason which fueled his will to die is the one which prevented him from suicide-his paralysis. His story brought the old and familiar debate on euthanasia to mind.
I think the movie which was based on his story kinna made him a hero. It seems to suggest that he is doing what others also wish for themselves but are too afraid to perform. I do not think that the fear which keeps people from taking their lives at some crisis makes them a coward. I think it takes courage to end one's life but it takes more than that to change one's mind about committing suicide.
I have done it again, haven't I? Veered into the topic which you have no response to. I'll stop.
He was involved in an accident when he was 25 that paralysed him from his neck down. He viewed his existence a burden to his care-taker and wanted to end his life with dignity. It is an irony that the very reason which fueled his will to die is the one which prevented him from suicide-his paralysis. His story brought the old and familiar debate on euthanasia to mind.
I think the movie which was based on his story kinna made him a hero. It seems to suggest that he is doing what others also wish for themselves but are too afraid to perform. I do not think that the fear which keeps people from taking their lives at some crisis makes them a coward. I think it takes courage to end one's life but it takes more than that to change one's mind about committing suicide.
I have done it again, haven't I? Veered into the topic which you have no response to. I'll stop.
Sunday, July 4, 2010
I love life for you are here
I am blessed. Truly I am. I am blessed with two most wonderful friends.
She looks out for me. My protector, my protectee. My partner in laughing craziness. I cannot hide anything from her. No use in trying. Many times, I tried but she sees right through me. As I, through her. She is my adviser. She is real. She is good beyond words can describe. And I, I am lucky.
He, on the other hand, is often our teasing target. We do that to amuse ourselves most of the time and he is good because he doesn't mind. He looks after me more than I know. He likes me. I like him too but not in the same way.
I shall be punished for being so selfish. For taking so much. But before that happens, before life robs me of the two best people I own, I shall enjoy our time together to the fullest. Even if I know I will look back and cry because these are the best days of my life and I will never have those days again. Because truly, I can never be happier than now.
She looks out for me. My protector, my protectee. My partner in laughing craziness. I cannot hide anything from her. No use in trying. Many times, I tried but she sees right through me. As I, through her. She is my adviser. She is real. She is good beyond words can describe. And I, I am lucky.
He, on the other hand, is often our teasing target. We do that to amuse ourselves most of the time and he is good because he doesn't mind. He looks after me more than I know. He likes me. I like him too but not in the same way.
I shall be punished for being so selfish. For taking so much. But before that happens, before life robs me of the two best people I own, I shall enjoy our time together to the fullest. Even if I know I will look back and cry because these are the best days of my life and I will never have those days again. Because truly, I can never be happier than now.
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Please try not to panic
Yes, you're right, this is my blog. And yes, it does look different. I've made the change that was long overdue.
Do you ever wonder how names come about? Is it just a factor of how the syllables would sound when put together, or does it have another, more significant basis? I do not mean the names of individual people. I mean the general class we give to things/animals likes dogs, cats, tables etc. People should definitely name things with some consideration. For instance, I would agree with the name of the animal wolf but not the cat. One would think that the cat should be called meo or something.
And anyhow, I have just completed my finals for semester one and boy, does life feel great. I used what was left of the exam induced adrenaline in my blood to stay awake all of last night in the company of a great book. My first indulgence after the exams. The next on my to-do list would be to devote myself religiously to youtube.
Do you ever wonder how names come about? Is it just a factor of how the syllables would sound when put together, or does it have another, more significant basis? I do not mean the names of individual people. I mean the general class we give to things/animals likes dogs, cats, tables etc. People should definitely name things with some consideration. For instance, I would agree with the name of the animal wolf but not the cat. One would think that the cat should be called meo or something.
And anyhow, I have just completed my finals for semester one and boy, does life feel great. I used what was left of the exam induced adrenaline in my blood to stay awake all of last night in the company of a great book. My first indulgence after the exams. The next on my to-do list would be to devote myself religiously to youtube.
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Subject Matters
I once heard that the sentence most often used in a person's life is I don't know.
I find myself saying that a lot lately. This is not good as exams are approaching. I think I am not being asked the right questions. Questions to which I have no answer come at me in various forms. And I can't even answer honestly. "I don't know" is not an acceptable answer. It never was.
I need to make a choice. One of three outcomes, all mutually exclusive. I am leaning towards one. The one which ends with the way it begins.
I find myself saying that a lot lately. This is not good as exams are approaching. I think I am not being asked the right questions. Questions to which I have no answer come at me in various forms. And I can't even answer honestly. "I don't know" is not an acceptable answer. It never was.
I need to make a choice. One of three outcomes, all mutually exclusive. I am leaning towards one. The one which ends with the way it begins.
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